Oh wells.. am so supposed to do my homework..econs article and EoM..
But im kinda going crazy already.
Haven't been able to find the correct Material to Evaluate for my pw work.
And seriously it's like madness.
Trying to catch up with work.
Plus....the crazy headache i have since morning.

RAHHHhhhhhh.

Anyway..everyone around me is going ga-ga about Harry Potter.
Either the book or the movie..that they are practically not doing any homework at all.
Hahs..but for me it doesnt bother me..though many have tried to persuade me to go watch movie with them..
Have been listening to special sermon, CEJ(Come Encounter Jesus) through phone for yesterday and today.
It was awesome.
Though i only managed to hear bits and pieces of it.

Was practically worried about my parents coming into my room and not knowing how to explain to them..
Many a times i've carried the phone and kinda jumped all over the room. (okay i noe it's silly.)
And for everytime either my sis rm's door open, or my parent's room door open, it's literally as though my heart has stopped beating once.
And anyway they did come in.
And not only once, but many times.
But everytime i would put the phone under the tv.
And because the preaching was very loud that it could still be heard even though i left it there, i increased the volume of the tv in order not to let my dad hear it.
Oh wells.
Sigh.

And the question, 'when are you going to tell ur dad about it?' has been thrown to me again.
When?? That's also one question i've asked myself many times but often finding no answers to it.
But the more i've tried to avoid it, the more often it comes to me.
Argh...but the thing is..it's not i dont want to ask but it's because i've already know the answer.. even without asking.
So what's the point of asking?!?!??!?!?!
Many will say 'u haven't even try so how do u noe the answer??'

But perhaps it's just because i dont want/am not prepared/afraid to face another failure..
Or rather another negative reply from my dad.
Though it may seems to be a small thing, but to me it really takes much effort and time to recover from each failed attempt and to try it again.
And as time passes, it has unknowingly became something im afraid of facing already.
And yea you can call me a coward for all you want.
Or rather, tell me what u will do if u're in my shoes.
But..........but........
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
i hate myself.

If only, i could have enough courage to be frank with my parents about what i was doing then. Sigh.