Wednesday, December 15, 2004
im kinda mad its like 2.30am le still haben slp mayb aftanoon nap take too long le ba dun feel like slpin....todae was alrite la...went to hall 4 band prac..den cuz when i got there onli wen n dunno hu was there i 4got cant rmb le....den i was like 'wo lai le....'den sir heard me den he sae'lang lai le....'den i was like er.....lolz.....hmm i think i veri clumsy leh...still feel so guilty....cuz we shift chairs ma den 2 chairs were stuck together....den i was like wanted to help gv n shang yu...den i nvr c shangyu face there den i take out the chair...den hit her mouth....4 a moment i was stunned sia dunno wad to do...den keep sae sry lo....me so blurr sia......
den break tym....the noodle stall nvr open den every1 ran to the maggie vending machine...[[[hmm sounds weird...]to buy food...den was like...jus tok to rx n yj lo...but feel quite odd dunno y....den go back hall 4 prac....so mani ppl late sia...den lily was slow again....lolz...retarded chromosomes=Xdie le lily yao kan wo le....lolz.....
haiz dunno y....we are all in the same situation again...jus tad the roles of ppl have changed...but the problem still lies....tis gold is hard to take...its near us but yet so far....it doesnt jus consist of individual but every1....onli if we cooperate den can we achieve......problems....haiz...hus the expert problem solver...pls help here....here nids help....sumtyms jus feel like me being so childish...fancy fighting over trival matters...[[[[think tads how we start to mature...]onli tru problems n problems we'll den learn...this is not a gd yr 4 me it has been a stressful...tiring...sadistic yr.....but it still comes to a end....life still has to go on...earth will not stop rotatin n tym will nvr stop 4 us....its onli up to individuals to learn n go on...or even be true to oneself........tad dae treshing brought me to tears n i cried wid all my might....cry it loud till the tears go dry....n frm this i believe i have learnt to be more mature be more sensitive.........life is jus made up of mani herdles...sum is easy sum is diffiicult..when u fall it may hurt...u can be veri eager to win...thinking tad u can jump 2 at a tym....but the pain when u fall will be extremeli painful but this will make u learn...every herdle every step....its ur own choice...i dun like to regret or i hate to regret.....since u made the bed so no matter wad u still hab to lie on it.....to think back...wad i did durin primary school tyms....was real childish n foolish...actualli when u grow up n recall u will think tad wadeva u did was veri foolish...this sure has been a lesson 4 me to learn....to be a leader hu dun wan...but how mani will truelli becum one?i noe the feelin of being alone is not gd...n i tried tad...a painful try...a sadful experience...an experience tad sureli no 1 will ever forget if they were me....i tried the feelin....jus more den ani1 else...to be alone in this world wid no frens...wanted to gib up n jus change over to another school...or even jus to end my life right there....wid acadamics pressure...idiotic dad...frens problems.....tads enuff...i noe it might seem small to sum ppl but its sure intimidating 4 me...when you jus got tad frustration in u tad u think u will jus break down sum dae...or even cry over every entry....tads wad i had...goin to school in tad dreadful feelin....fearin tad the dae will be bad again n will not be able to tolerate tru...putting a fake smile 4 every1 to c but inside bleeding badly...real bad......trying to pull urself to band...hatin band when u used to like it veri much....i tried tad...n i hate it...the onli word to describe it is HELL............a true hell...tad falll has been a real impactful......sudden 1....jus widout noein...ur frens tad u consider them the best falls out wid u n jus suddenli ignore u....thinkin ur transparent...when u tok to them n u get no reply...when u wan to be wid them..they throw u out...when they are all happy together but u alone in the corner....when u cry they luff.......when u nid help n theres simply nuttin u can actualli get frm tad point of tym...when u feel like crying n theres simply no shoulder 4 u to lean....when u wan to tok but no1 listens....when u get bad results scolded by parents u can onli keep it to urself...when u got happy things no1 is there to share wid u...its a true hell i mus sae...tad u can realli suffer in there n no1 will ever pull u up...its up to u to climb out the hole...it has alwaes been my fault..n i noe it...straightforwardness is both my weakness n strength.....this has been a more painful 1 den the previous p5 experience...tad ill nver forget...not in my life...i've tried it...n i think no 1 will wan it...neither do i wan to make sum1 have the taste of tad...its realli bitter...I'VE TRIED TAD HELL...ITS REAL BAD.....DUN EVER TRY....
2:26 AM Back to top
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The Child;
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